Navigate the American Health Care System

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Navigate the American Health Care System is a song featured in South Park: The End of Obesity.

Background

Cartman, Kyle and Butters visit the health insurance company in order to get the money for Cartman's weight-loss drugs. After being refused they go on an odyssey consisting of paperwork and visiting various different doctors to try to get the insurance to pay for the medication.

Lyrics

We're gonna navigate the American health care system
It's there for you and me


Secretary:
Just fill out those forms.

We're gonna get better
And we're gonna be strong
And as healthy as can be


Doctor:
I need to send you to Imaging.

Let's navigate the American health care system

Secretary:
Just fill out these forms.

Kyle:
I just- I just filled 'em out at the last place.

It's so much fun to be getting it done

Doctor:
I can't sign this for insurance. His original doctor needs to sign this.

We go back to the doctor
To get that thing for insurance
Then go back to insurance...


*Silence*

Insurance worker:
We need you to get a second opinion from a doctor who's in network.

Kyle:
Ugh.

We're navigating the American health care system
Now just watch us go
We're getting things done, taking care of our health...


Secretary:
We need these filled out and then faxed to your insurance company.

We're filling out forms
And we're scanning those forms
And then we're emailing those forms
To get them back to insurance


*Silence*

Insurance worker:
We need confirmation from a different specialist.

Let's go and navigate the American health care system
It's the best system of them all...


Kyle:
No, we already talked to the insurance company. They were supposed to talk to you.

And we go back to the doctor
We go back to the specialist
Who talks to the insurance company
That faxes the medical advisor
Who's on a boat in the Maldives


Medical advisor:
No.

And we're going in one place
And we're getting out the other place
And we're back over here now
And I was just over there
And I'm getting confused and it's getting dark
And my mind is all different colors
And I think I'm lost.


Butters:
Hey fellas, I think I'm lost in the American health care system. Fellas? Fellas?! Help!


Songs from Paramount+ Movies
Cry Little Sister | Family Affair | Free Ride | Happy Birthday to You | I Forgive You | I Got Cred, Bitches | It's My Life What Ever I Wanna Do | I've Got Some Apples | Love, Faith, and Fear | Mikhelm, Mikhelm | Mutiny on the Sea | Navigate the American Health Care System | Slippery When Wet | Something Cool to Happen to Me | Stir It Up | Summertime Girls | The Star-Spangled Banner | Use Me | WAP | We Are Living in the Future | We Miss You Randy | Whiskey Bent and Hell Bound | You Don't Miss Your Water

See also: List of Songs | List of Movies