Not My Waterpark
"Not My Waterpark" is a song sung by Eric Cartman in the Season Thirteen episode, "Pee".
Background
Eric Cartman sings this song in a montage at Pi Pi's Splashtown, expressing his bigoted beliefs about minorities "taking over" the water park. As he laments this turn of events, we see Hispanic, African-American, and Asian individuals enjoying all of the park's attractions. Cartman also notes that the security guards are minorities too and complains about instructions being given in Spanish instead of in English. None of the minorities are shown preventing him from participating in activities.
Lyrics
What has happened to this place?
I don’t recognize it anymore.
It used to be so fun and special.
What is life worth living for?
The dream is dead, our land is gone;
There’s a hole in my heart and I can’t go on.
There are too many minorities (minorities)
At my water park (my water park).
This was our land, our dream (our dream)
and they’ve taken it all away.
They just keep coming and coming (minorities).
I tried to go and tell the police,
But even the authorities
Are minorities
At my water park.
There’s no place for me to sit anymore,
And the lines just keep getting crazier.
There are Mexicans all around me.
The lazy river has never been lazier.
It’s a 40 minute wait to go down one slide,
And the instructions are in Spanish on the Zip Line ride!
(Guarden los brazos y piernas dentro del paseo) [Spanish for: Keep arms and legs inside the ride]
Just do it in English!
There are too many minorities (too many)
At my water park (somebody do something).
Where did they all come from?
Why can’t they leave this land alone?
And it’s such a tragedy (feel a bit like dying).
We looked the other way too long.
We’ve got to change our priorities
And get all these minorities
Out of my water park
(Minorities) Mexicans and Asians,
(Black people), I think I even saw Native Americans (gross).
God I’m asking please, get all of these minorities
Out of my water park (my water park).
Trivia
- In South Park: The Stick of Truth, this song can be heard when the radio in Cartman's room is turned on.
- The song vocals are dimmed and the instrumentals are tuned up during Comedy Central airings.
See Also