Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut

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"Mecha-Streisand"

"Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut"

"Terrance and Phillip in Not Without My Anus"

"Cartman's Mom Is a Dirty Slut"
Episode no.	Season 1 Episode 13
Guest stars	Jay Leno
Production no.	113
Original airdate	February 25, 1998
Episode chronology Previous Next "Mecha-Streisand" "Terrance and Phillip in Not Without My Anus"
List of all South Park episodes

"Cartman's Mom Is a Dirty Slut" is the 13th and final episode of Season One, and the 13th overall episode of South Park. This is the first of a two part episode; the second part being "Cartman's Mom is Still a Dirty Slut". It first aired on February 25, 1998.

Synopsis

Who is Eric Cartman's father? It could be anyone who attended South Park's 12th Annual Drunken Barn Dance.

Plot

Spoiler warning! Plot details follow.

The episode starts with Kyle, Stan, and Kenny ditching school to look for Cartman. After finding him in the backyard playing with dolls, they go to Mr. Mackey's office to tell him about the incident. Per Mackey's request, the boys catch him on camera having a tea party with his dolls.

Later that night, Cartman asks his mom if he has a dad. She tells him a story about how she had sex with Chief Running Water at the Drunken Barn Dance and became pregnant with Cartman. Taking this information, he decides to dress up as a Native American and go to the Ute reservation to find his supposed father. When he gets there, Chief Running Water informs Cartman that he's not his dad and that his mom is a slut. Cartman finds out that it wasn't Chief Running Water that Liane slept with, but instead Chef.

Meanwhile, the rest of the boys are watching an advertisement for Terrance and Phillip in: Not Without my Anus before Grandpa Marsh changes the channel to America's Stupidest Home Videos. Bob Saget announces that there would be a $10,000 prize to whoever could send in the funniest home video. This gives them the idea to enter in their video of Cartman's tea party

The next day Cartman shows up at the bus stop dressed like an African American while Stan, Kenny, and Kyle are trying to get their go-kart working. He eventually does, but is yanked behind it and can't let go. He eventually lands upside down on some tracks before getting hit by a train.

Cartman in the meantime visits Chef's house and calls him his "pops". Chef is shocked and explains that he and Liane only kissed and sings a song about making love. Much to Cartman's dismay, Chef denies his fatherhood and recalls that the man Liane was with last that night was actually Mr. Garrison.

Stan and Kyle's video of Cartman is aired on America's Stupidest Home Videos. Sharon and Randy inform the boys that Kenny was killed by a train, to which the boys respond nonchalantly. Bob Saget then announces that their video has made it into the finals, causing the two of them to celebrate.

Garrison is at the bar with Mr. Hat when Cartman bursts in, demanding to know why he was never told that Garrison was his father. Garrison admits that he slept with Liane that night, but asks who didn't. Only one person in the bar claims they hadn't, confirming that Cartman's mom is indeed a slut. Cartman is dismayed that he would never know who his father was, until Dr. Mephesto offers to do a DNA test on him to find out who his biological father is; however, it would cost him $3,000. Cartman does not have the money and leaves dejectedly.

At the bus stop the next day, Cartman seems down. When Stan and Kyle ask him what's wrong, he explains that he would never know who his father is because he doesn't have the money. They tell Cartman that they had a way to have a way to get him his $3,000, causing Cartman to thank the two of them while they respond nervously.

That night, the boys all watch America's Stupidest Home Videos, with Cartman unaware that his video was one of the entries. When their videotape plays, Cartman becomes pissed off. The last video is shown, which depicts Kenny getting hit by a train. This last entry wins the $10,000 prize, much to the boys' disappointment. This is short-lived, however, when Bob Saget claims that the other finalists would be winning a $3,000 prize instead. Though Stan and Kyle exclaim that Cartman could still get his DNA test, this is not enough to mollify Cartman, who is livid and threatens to kill him for using his video tape.

The scene cuts to the South Park Genetic Engineering Ranch, where Cartman, Mephesto, Liane, and all his potential fathers are waiting. Before Mephesto can read the name of Cartman's father, an announcer cuts in, listing who the potential fathers could be. It is then announced that the answer would be given in the next episode four weeks later, causing Cartman to curse at before the episode ends.